January 15, 2011

Wishing for simpler times

First thing's first. I apologize. I've been without a PC for awhile and it's been making me a little crazy. I've been very busy in the world of FFXI but haven't had a means to convey my actions to all of you. No promises of a long blog explaining what has happened since then, but there is one thing I'd like to mention.

See, I joined this small group of people a few weeks ago for Abyssea. Just a few people, and usually 3 or 4 during each event. Fights were exciting and since the group was small, people seemed to bond a bit faster. We were getting items and gear constantly, and it was just incredibly fun.

Then more people came.

I'm not sure how to explain my reaction. A bit of selfishness mixed with hesitation, but still optimistic. I don't know what the definition of "lowman" is, so I'm not sure if we are still a small group or not. Most of the new people are names that I didn't know, so that always makes things a little uncomfortable. Aside from the obvious part of gear acquisition slowing down, now events just take longer. Takes longer to start because we're waiting for so many more people. When everyone gathers, we have to wait while it's decided what we're going to do. More people = more decisions = more time spent planning.

Fights aren't as simple as they were before. I swear it takes longer to do the fights now than it did before. Maybe that's my mind playing tricks, but it sure seems like things went smoother and faster when we first started. Turul excluded, mind you. That thing's just a bastard. Now I see people getting frustrated, events lasting even longer than before, and it just doesn't seem as enjoyable anymore. Still, I can't help but think back to a few weeks ago when it was just a few people having a good time in Abyssea.

You'd think that me saying all this means that I don't like linkshells or large group events. Well, I do admit that lowmanning seems easier, but this is a large scale MMO. It makes sense to have events with a lot of people. In all honesty, I still like that. It's just that this group started out small and fun. As we expand, things just don't seem that way anymore.

I know my thoughts are selfish, and it's probably a bad thing to even admit them. These are all nice people. I feel pretty crappy for thinking this way. Still, a part of me really does wish that it would just go back to when it was all so simple.

It's late and I'm tired. Maybe my mind will be different in the morning. Happier rants await!


Rocko said...

I havent been on lately to observe what has been going on much but i do know about the expansion of the group and jaci ur not wrong at all. our small man group and developed into a small merc sized group. the frustrations will be there since u and i know that our small group was able to do stuff more effectively. Add to that u dont have me to rant to during we on game and vice versa. Miss the group and what we have done in the past. Ill be back on soon enough!

Jacinda said...

Get back online! Jiri's TH keeps failing. =/

aerroenu said...

I happen to lowman Abyssea seals with a couple of friends who stuck together after the leader of our Dynamis LS /ragequit. The leader/co-leader of our lowman LS is in another Abyssea LS with a couple of our members, and it seems like some of the stressful attitude is rubbing off on our leader. There's been a couple of times where he's criticized some of us for "not doing a lot outside of the LS for the group", an accusation that happens a lot (particularly from the leader) in the other Abyssea LS. (Even though half of us are really busy, we all gather early and regular and bring not only our NM pops but each others', too.) The last run he was extremely distracted to the point of running through mobs without sneak or invis, something he's a huge stickler about. He was also losing his temper when an LS that tried to MPK the other Abyssea LS kept popping one particular NMs who drop the 2 seals he needed. He was also ignoring our voices of concern and our attempts to keep the situation relaxed.

I've tried to attend a few of the other LS's Abyssea runs whenever I get the next day off ('cause the place I work makes me want to punch my coworkers). Even though it's easier to get atma with a larger (or, really, more varied) group of people, I still adamantly prefer our lowman group. Even though we have a rather slow person, but he's old, gives it his all, and means well, which is fine enough for me.

Rocko said...

lol Jaci, good to know im loved still. ill be on soon i had to rebuy a lot of cpu stuff so i can get back.

Lisa said...

One of my LS disbanded after the leader realized doing events with less people is more rewarding.
I must say I get impressed everytime I see a mnk and a whm duo a lot of things that an alliance wiped when the second set of abyssea was released...

TamTu said...

If you ever want my WAR or WHM for anything, we need to duo stuff for funsies <3

I'm starting to get tired of cranky and stressed out former-EGLS-Relic-Wielding people :|

Vyiv said...

I'm dying to read more rants of insanity.

Krystela Rose said...

I remember you and that group, unfortunately my fiance and I was part of that "expension" you hated so much, sorry that we broke your awesome group at the time, we were really close friends with neebix and he wanted us to come with you guys.

I guess now I understand why you left the group out of no where.