November 29, 2010

That special group

You know what I wish I had more than anything else in this game? It's not gear, gil, power, or anything of that sort. What I desire is to have a small group of competent and skilled friends.

Now, I actually do have friends who are very skilled. Extremely skilled, in some cases. However, they are rarely available. Those who are available aren't usually around at consistent times, or I can only find one or two people at any given moment. Because of this, I usually wind up doing a lot of things on my own or with pickup groups if I'm lucky.

I truly don't understand why it seems so difficult for me to find a small group that I fit into. This should not be confused with a feeling of isolation with my current LS; I don't feel that at all. It's quite the opposite. I'm very much at home with this group. Well, when I can access the vent server, at least. Right now, I'm a bit detached from them because of some internet problems, but that's another tale.

What I'm talking about is that group of friends that you run out and do small things with. You know, go fight some NMs, do some quests or missions, farm some items...that sort of thing. That's the kind of group I want to be in, but my friends are always so scattered or already in their established groups. I don't always think about this type of deal, but a recent event brought it to the forefront of my thoughts. Are you ready for a story, my wonderful minions? Here we go.

A couple of posts back, I mentioned I had returned to leveling Summoner. I definitely like the job, but I had more or less retired that class. There's a reason behind everything I do, even when it appears trivial. Remember all the talk about improving some of my primary jobs? Summoner was never on that list, but I've been using that job more often than not lately. The reason behind this is because there are some other items in Abyssea that I am after, and really don't want to bother my LS or other people for. Items that are important to me don't necessarily have that same meaning for anyone else.

Enter the realm of the Iron Giants. I'm sure you've seen shouts for their items in Port Jeuno while you're looking for a party. Well, in my quest to improve, I noticed that these enemies have a few items that would be really useful to me. The first giant on the list for me is Ironclad Severer. I chose this one for multiple reasons. With this one, I could improve 2 jobs that are very useful in Abyssea (BLM / SMN) and there is also an item that would really help me with my melee TP set for Dancer, Corsair, and quite possibly even Ranger.

The next step was figuring out how to beat it. This is where SMN came into play. Could I do it with other jobs more effectively? I actually think I could do it faster as an RDM, but I still don't have wyrmal legs for movement speed. Though I have the Atma of Ambition, I think I'd be cutting just a bit too close for comfort. If I do ever get those pants, I'll certainly give it a shot. So I get SMN leveled, merited, and head off to find this thing. The first fight was not fun. I had no idea what to expect, despite reading wiki. I died multiple times, but I was fortunate enough to be on at a time when no one was camping. I came back each time until I finished the fight. Pitiful as it may seem, this is only the second major NM that I have ever fought on my own; the first being Boompadu a while back.

I remember telling Dierdren when I won. My hands were shaking and I was so excited to realize that I could not only fight this, but I could beat it. Naturally, the first fight took a long time for me. Well over an hour. Chalk it up to being inexperienced and afraid to take risks. Not to mention the whole multiple death and homepoints. Near the end, I did have a bit of help from Jamarn so it wasn't a 100% solo effort. Still, I was more confident to fight this without help now that I had an understanding of what it would do. Along with this win came the first of the upgrades, which went to SMN. While I could've taken the BLM piece too, I wanted Jamarn to have something for coming out and helping.

This was to become the place where I spent most of my solo time online. If I wasn't trying to build time somewhere, I was searching for this NM. When I saw people online who I thought might be willing to help, I'd wait to see if I could get the claim and then ask them to come out. Sometimes they would be able to, but many of the fights were done without them. At times when I arrived and someone was fighting it, I noticed something very different between them and me: They weren't alone. No matter who I met in that area, no one was ever by themselves. If a single person was there and got the claim, it was only a few minutes until an entire party arrived to help them.

So then I started to wonder, why don't I have that? Where's my group? For all the friends I've got on my friend list, why can't I get that small band of people that does stuff like this? I didn't want to beg people to come help me, so I just stuck it out and asked the few people that I saw online.

I think the most disheartening news I received during this whole thing was when I encountered a Japanese THF at the camp one day. I was fighting the giant when I got caught without Stoneskin and died. While there, a WHM was watching. I asked if they wanted an item and was willing to give it to them if they needed it. They said "I'm sorry" and I continued on until I died. At that moment, another Summoner entered. Then more people came, including this THF. He was the reason they all showed up. Turns out he and I were both after the last and most important item from this NM, Taranis's Harness.

There wasn't any expressed hatred from either side. I lost the NM and they claimed it. Fair is fair, I suppose. Miliani did show up to help me, but I more or less figured they would kill it and I just wanted the ToD. Turns out that Ironclad was pretty pissed from all of us messing around with it and it dropped the other group too. We got it back and continued the fight. While it was technically "my" NM since I got it when it first spawned, I felt a little sympathetic towards the other party. So I made a proposal to team up. It took a little while through auto-translate, but he agreed and we made it a team effort. Stupid giant still didn't put out, but now I had a small team to do this faster. He was willing to camp Severer as long as it took, but I had to run for Dynamis before the next spawn. Naturally, I get a tell mid-run. "{Body} GET ! ! ! !" Goddamn Dynamis.

Anyway, when our run was over, I resume the camping. The THF would talk to me in /t, but he was nowhere to be found as far as camping was concerned. He then told me: "You {/no} {Element} WS = {/no} drop." Referring to triggering the weakness of Abyssea NMs, he more or less told me that I was shit out of luck on getting that harness as long I was fighting as a Summoner. There was simply no feasible method for me to trigger the weakness. A part of me hated him for saying that, but he seemed to be right so far. Breathem tried to help me a few times with weaknesses, but it just didn't happen. The thought of not having a group got to me more and more.

People say that it's so easy to get a group of friends and go do things whenever you want. I beg to differ. Then again, maybe it's just me.

November 13, 2010


Why are you people like this?

I'm a nice person, and I think that's going to eventually cause me to explode and hurt someone online. More accurately, I think I'd take out a group of people. Namely men.

I swear on all things holy, you guys are pissing me off by the day. All this bullshit flirting is getting old extremely quick. I have friends who like to call me "hon, sweetie, cutie" and all that good stuff. Those people are fine. It's more a term of endearment than anything else. They might even say some stuff that would normally warrant a slap, but they are my friends and it's ok. To you other guys, cut that shit out. Seriously, it's damn pathetic.

Running up to me in town and staring me down while you say stupid shit just makes you look desperate and idiotic. Perhaps it's all in good fun and a joke to you, but I don't like it and I'd truly appreciate it if you would simply get the fuck out. Go away with your cheesy ass lines and stupid boasting. Knowing that you're pimped out isn't going to make me want to be your virtual girlfriend and brag to everyone about how I get to be with you while you deck me out too. I don't swing on anybody's dick hairs, so stop trying.

"Oooh baby, look at my new AF3+1. I can get it for you too if you hang out with me."
"Damn girl, you are so hot."
/stare /nod /stare /smile.

That's the best you people have? Please get the fuck out.

I might bitch, whine, and complain a lot about what I don't have but I am not that damn desperate to be with anyone or to get gear.

November 8, 2010

Summoner sucks

....when put in Abyssea parties with mages. >.>

I'm not certain if I was just bored or hadn't done anything painful lately, but I decided to go back to leveling my only pet class. Well, I'm a level 3 Beastmaster but I doubt that's going to do me any good during events.

I got my first invite and was ready to go. I'm the first to admit that I'm not a pimped-out Summoner, but I still wanted to contribute whatever damage I could. That was part of my issue. I've always had a dislike for people who consider SMN little more than a support class with a pet, but that just seems to be the mentality of most. I blame it on the /WHM subjob. As luck would have it, I didn't really have to worry about healing anyone. We had plenty of mages and the party was going well.

Until the BLMs started running out of MP.

Confused? Me too. Even without Atmas, there really isn't much of a reason that a BLM should be running out of MP in Abyssea. Still, they were. So what does that mean for me? I was out there to throw out some avatar buffs, get some damage in, and kick ass with that fail of an avatar, Odin. More on that another day. With BLMs running out of mp, I wasn't able to do that. Instead, I got to stand around with Diabolos flapping his damn wings in my face.

I cannot begin to describe how goddamn boring that is.

First off, Diabolos sucks as an offensive summon. He's been a joke of an avatar since his release. I honestly don't know why people put forth the effort to do his battle. Nether Blast? Sure, if you've got several SMNs spamming the ability. Otherwise, I'll pass on that and continue to think of it as a waste of my MP. Now with Avatar's Favor, Diabolos has a bit of redemption in the fact that he can restore a bit of MP after a time. What good does that do for me? Not a damn bit. What it does; however, is put me to sleep. Which I did a few times. Seriously, spamming Dream Shroud is just mind-numbing.

Thankfully, the party either disbanded or I had to leave. My mind was so messed up from boredom that I honestly don't remember the circumstances of my departure. I was 75 when I started, and midway through 76 when I left. All I know is that there was no way in hell that I'd be able to maintain that method of play for 9 more levels.

November 5, 2010


Tidis hit the nail on the head awhile back when it comes to my blogging. I'm not nearly as consistent as I once was. Shocking, I know. When this blog first started it had the format of "A day in the life," with me posting my daily activities and how I felt about it. This is fine and dandy, but you're eventually going to end up posting the same thing over and over and over. Especially if you manage to stick with the same linkshell for an extended period.

Then it went from what I did everyday to the items I obtained. While I have posted some of the things I've picked up since I started here, I never wanted this to become a blog about shiny items. I remember reading a post which pretty much summed up how I felt about the "look at me" types of blogs. Though I think my disdain for them is more or less because I don't boast very often, and I find little interest in doing so.

Of course, most of this blog has now become a repository for the repressed rage that builds up over the course of my playtime. It's therapeutic in a way. It prevents me from going ballistic on people while also keeping me from destroying my home in a fit of anger. Not saying that I want to hurt anyone I game with, but I will say that I have an extremely active and vivid imagination when it comes to methods of dealing discomfort.

Still, it seems that my thoughts and my desire to blog do come to the occasional impasse. I love blogging and I probably should have started it as soon as I began FFXI. I have plenty of things that I want to talk about, but I wonder how much of it is worth reading. Then again, I used to just sign on to this site and talk about whatever was running through my head at the moment. Perhaps I should stick to less thinking, more typing.