Confessional

It's never easy to give up something you enjoy or are passionate about. Case and point is me blogging about a game that I'm not supposed to be playing. Maybe it would have been easier if I were enraged when I decided to give away the currency I had saved up for my relic and sign off. Maybe if I had just sold everything I had, or deleted my character. Hell, I haven't even canceled my account, and I honestly doubt that I ever will.

I never wanted to leave in the first place. Of course, it's not like I've been gone for long anyway. Barely a week now, I think. I have plenty of things to do besides FFXI and I've been doing them. Still, I miss the music. I miss the friends I hardly got to see. I miss my damn greatsword and Resolution. Seriously, you people have no idea how cute I am as a Dark Knight. Adorable AND badass ...yeah.

I don't know what I should do. Log on and subject myself to the same lonely feeling that has plagued me for months; or stay signed off and keep having this desire to sign on? A friend of mine used to play Warcraft heavily, and he fought his desire by putting the CD on a barbecue grill to destroy it.

I couldn't do that even if I hated this game. Disc cost too much when I bought it.